Turn Me Over Please

This is a saying that my mother taught me and I have been using for years.  Every time I get into an emotional slump, I look at the back of my hand and turn it over, as to say, 'it's time.' Time to turn over a new leaf and stop dwelling over things you can not control.  Today marks the beginning of summer vacation and instead of wallowing in negativity, as I have been doing for the past week, I am going to 'live in the now.'  I am going to focus on myself first, taking things slowly, relishing the unstructured time, the time when I don't have to be routine oriented whatsoever.  I can get so carried away with making plans (or thinking about the fact that I feel left out of so many other people's plans, this needs to stop before I get an ulcer) and seeing who I can visit with, and where I can take the kids.  But this summer, I am not going to do that.  We have some family vacations planned and one week of camp and that is all.  I don't feel it's necessary to send my kids off to camps for the entire summer, I want to be with them.
At times I feel like I bend over backwards trying to take advantage of the time I have during the summer to make up for lost time visiting with friends, close and far.  And, I'm not going to lie, a lot of times I don't feel that the efforts are reciprocated.  But I have to say that I do feel lonely at times being far from my childhood friends (and their families) and my own family.  I realize that everyone has there own things going on, and let's me be honest, I have a very hard time handling the fact that it's not all about me.  I am not afraid to admit that, but again, that is part of turning over my new leaf :)
So this summer, I am taking time to appreciate all the wonderful things I can do with my kids and enjoy THEM, because I don't get to during the school year.  Unfortunately, that will take some of my time away from this blog, which I thoroughly enjoy, but I don't want it to become an obligation, because then I will resent it.  I can't stand obligations.  If I have a photo, a story, a joke, a list to share I will, if not...eh.........I somewhat use this blog as an online journal and it has been very therapeutic for me.  For years people have advised me to 'journal' and that is just so unappealing to me.  This is has been a modified way for me to accomplish that.
I have also spent a lot of time thinking about our family's eventual (and necessary) relocation and that has kept me from establishing some meaningful relationships here.  I think it's time to do that.  BUT, I am not going to plan it.  I am tired of saying, 'one more year.'  I am going to enjoy the time and all of the opportunities this area has to offer.   
All in all, what I am saying is, I am here and I will be enjoying some most needed time with my family.  If you would like to talk or visit, I will be here on the new side of my leaf :)